Why.

It's the saddest weight to carry of those whose souls more than just pang with searing grief. It's more than just losing a part of your heart that is outside of your body when you lose a loved one; especially a child. I cannot fathom the sting of pain that runs to the depths of a person's spirit. I look to Mother Mary, and the way she stood at the foot of the cross and watched her Son bleed for each and every one of us. At the utter measure of grief felt by her pierced and breaking heart, yet also staring in the face of immeasurable forgiveness. It makes me wonder and think about how far the world has come and shed from that day at Calvary. How the blood stains on that wooden cross hasn't held the magnitude of earth shattering sacrifice to every Son of Adam or Daughter of Eve's heart like it should have. We are as perfectly imperfect as our broken yet beautiful world. To the Lion that was once a lamb first, we all have to implore ourselves to look for our creator, especially when we think we can't find him (he is always there) and bleed with him instead of by our own hand. We have to set our minds towards the sights of atonement and carve sin out of our bodies before we can in our world. We can't point the finger of blame to God, our Lord Jesus Christ before we point it to the reflections we see in the mirror. We all need to set the language of peace and prayer, but more than anything not to lose the humanity we already cannot see anymore. This world has been hemorrhaging the value, meaning, and beauty of life for far too long. We have to remove the wool the devil has put before our eyes.Through division, through social economic standing, through political opposition, through the lens of right vs left, when the opposite of right is and will always be wrong. This world has become tone deaf to grace, and immortalized the false hoods of lies without a window leading back to truth. This world has neglected mercy. God's children are the most precious pearls within this world and water that has been blessed by Jesus himself. 

Why can we no longer measure kindness, but we can measure hatred? Why can't we sit at a table united and never torn apart? Why can we only see those whose opinions do not match our own? Why can’t we see the sacred gifts from Heaven that the Angels and Saints have implored us to, sent by Jesus directly. The violence of our world, we pray for it to end, but aside from yearning for change- what do we do individually? We can all truly become our own worst enemy, can we not? So is it us? Does it start with you? Does it start with me? We lay blame to our computer screens and deem the internet as vile and toxic. But the internet isn't its own entity that can breathe and judge like we can. It's us, it's the people that use it. A gun did not wake up this morning and choose to end the lives of innocent children. A confused and disturbed young man did. We lay blame at the feet of our Lord and savior, yet we ignore sin. No one questions the peril this society faces enough. The why. The opposition isn't Republican or Democrat. This opposition is sin or saved. We cannot stand by any longer while the politicization of our most special gifts in this world are obliterated. Innocence needs to be preserved and protected. Just as God the Father left the ninety-nine to save the one, we need to rise above the darkness, above temptation, above this worldly vice filled world. We need to let the light in the places of our minds, hearts, and souls that haven't healed yet. We are all surviving this broken sorrow filled prism. Even in the face of unspeakable and egregious tragedy. Suffering isn't for the meek, yet it can still be preventable. Because the good truly does win in this end. We just have to find- through the depths of our wounds the map of hope to lead us all there. Even more crucially, let me ask you; do you all want to know God, or be known by God? Which way will lead us where?

The belly of the beast isn’t the enemy of the one who thinks differently than you do. The belly of the beast is the devil. 

I will pray for each child and parent that endured unimaginable fear and anguish today. I will pray for the children who lost their lives. I will pray for the nightmares to be held at bay. I will pray for their wounds to heal quickly. I will pray for the safety and peace of God's hand to be felt by each child affected. I will pray for the afflictions to each child, parent, teacher, priest, and first responder to be lifted; and though it may even sting further for us all that are hindered by more sin carried out by these lost sheep- I will pray for the sin encapsulated and tortured soul who branded horror on this day that is burning so we learn the integral layer of the question why. Why Jesus died, not for sin- but for the forgiveness of sin even though it made him bleed. Even though it made him hurt. Even though that is the epitome of why God gave his only Son. So we find our way home, and forgo the knee-jerk reaction to sin being more sin this time. So we listen and truly learn. I will pray and I hope you all do too, and more; I call upon God, the blood of the lamb to bring us all towards the peace he promised he would give us. No matter the dread. No matter the noise. No matter the strife. No matter how people compelled by power, greed, or money would categorize the things we can't take with us to Heaven- as more valued than the life of innocent blood spilt. If we forget this message, maybe it's Jesus' cross that we can help him carry throughout the rest of history going forward; so we won’t ever lose again looking back at the destruction of what can beckon when innocence is forsaken by the wrath of cruelty. Through really the totality of a premature death before physical death itself can echo.

Deanna Marie Battista  

8.27.2025