The Poetic Threads To This Catholic Girl's Soul

Written By: Deanna Marie Battista

Twenty seven wishes for the girl that always struggled. With a bright expanse of moonlight to help blanket away the darkness and all of her wounds. To the girl branded with light being your greatest scar- I thank God for the girl you were before you found him. I thank God for the girl that looked under every stone until her heart itself, it was no longer. That’s her Father that she found, really he found me. 

He is the great I am. The great I get to keep and the greater half of me I will find one day. Until then I get to walk in and with peace. Blessings were once ‘so lost to me, or so I thought. It’s hard to see the good in pain, but that’s what it was and will always be. I never walked in the shadow of healing. I was held in a prism cured bubble that was always meant to preserve me for… today… tomorrow… and however long I’m blessed with this life to be a reflection and glorify the great Lion I now know!

The pain… Feel it because it’s a gift! All of those tears, all of that heartache;

use your pain for good, and then afterwards; thank God for it. 

I’d rather feel the pain, and feel everything it comes with- than feel nothing at all. 

A blessed curse, it both is and isn’t.

   Through the quest to calm. The vacancy of losing hope just to gain it back tenfold, I found the good that was never locked away to begin with. Through my journey, a key I had always tried to find. When it was the image I was created all along I needed to recognize. This to see in order to walk through the ever opened door of my whole un-brusied and healed soul. The forgiveness I’ve learned by God has been the most enamoring gift one could cipher. It’s brought me closer to the hue of blue I’ve always been led to so that I could leave it behind for others to see me by seeing him. That’s the girl he forged in holy fire. I’m ready. Steady. I’m healed, and waiting for all the souls that need to meet the blue crescent branded girl he called forth. Can you see me? You see what he formed and created, melded and washed clean? I’m a writer, yes- though these words dipped within the holiness and better version of myself I now am is who the world deserves. Yes, now you see me … My whole heart and God’s.

    Through the holy song that guides my way. The path towards more tools that are needed in my rendition. The one where I build with many different mechanisms and mediums that is my only will, his. To continue to spread the good news. Share. Inspire. Redeem, and to introduce. All the while step by step, brick by brick; building the staircase that leads all souls to heaven. It’s the greatest fight in the world to be called to join. How many of God’s children will be led to heaven. How many of God’s children's souls will lay at the devil’s feet and go to hell? How many of God’s children can I save and lead away from the fire that opposes holy songs and carves instruments within the bones of those who closed their eyes and laid their eyes within wool from the blemished wolf in sheep’s clothing- This who then parades around with sin to sell? How many souls will I be able to bring back to my Father with this life of mine. How many? Through those gates, the map is clear, my life I give to Christ; when really it’s his he gave, that gave me mine. Help me with this construction, no more demolition. It’s time, just like it’s always been for a while now. To ignore the world. Listen, heed, and discern. Oh the throne your heart will become. The Lord is ready and waiting for his sons and daughters… are you? One step, one leap; breathe… 

Now pray.

     Through time. Slow or fast, you will learn to hear the only voice and will to follow. You will be taught and discern to ignore all the others. The world, and even your own. Through each season, trial, and mark on a day that brings you joy or even new pain. With every change, ending and beginning. You will find the start of the thread that you are meant to pull from deep down within. The thread that will tie off the loss of holiness, and pull together your sorrow and healing in one neat little bow. This is what awaits you, all the more reason to follow me to follow him. That pull you feel, don’t shy away from it. That feeling that you can’t shake, let it stay. The allure that isn’t so- but is truly the magnet to pull yourself and soul close, don’t ignore it. Don’t fight it, let it in, the windows of heaven. Especially before you’d ever think twice about allowing the devil to rip the new you to shreds. God is here and he always will be. It’s our turn, each mustard seed at a time, to soak in the guise of the light that others need to find. 

Yours Truly, 

                   Deanna Marie 

                                    Always Writing with Light